Full Night’s Sleep
The title of this article is a little deceiving, I do not have a magical formula on how to get an actual full night’s sleep… in fact, last night was a strange night.
The baby woke up three times (she usually sleeps through the night), my four-year-old woke up twice, and my two-year-old woke up once. With three little ones, it is inevitable I will be woken up at least once during the night, but last night was baaad. It was the weirdest thing though, I was not upset. I actually had extra patience. This is rare because I swear I turn into a different person when I lack sleep. I am usually irritable, short tempered, and have some angry creature-like attributes. Tonight was different for some reason. I was happy to hold the hand of my four-year old as I walked her back to her bed (twice). Grateful to give her kisses and hugs in the middle of the night. I was grateful for extra baby snuggles and that baby hand feeling for my face.
Seriously, this is NOT the norm. I have shed my fair share of tears due to a lack of sleep, but something inside me kept saying, just embrace this. Just like my cold oatmeal article, I kept thinking…
Someday I will get a full night’s sleep and I will be missing these night time loves
It is nice to be needed
It is nice to be the one person that can calm or comfort my child
I also think I can attribute some of this thinking is due to the recent reading (when I say reading I mean listening to audible..this mama ain’t got time….or can’t stay awake long enough to actually read…) of Brene Brown’s books:
—The Gifts of Imperfect Parenting (audio)
—The Power of Vulnerability (audio)
—I Thought It Was Just Me (But it Isn’t)
Yes, I have listened to all of these!! Once I started I could not stop!! Brene Brown is seriously amazing! She has opened my eyes to so many amazing concepts like the ideas of being vulnerable and living in a society of scarcity.
There are so many outside sources and social media voices constantly telling audiences that we do not have enough, like sleep. According to Brown, many of us wake up thinking we didn’t have enough sleep or didn’t do enough the day before. It’s important to realize that we have enough and that we are enough. I kept thinking that if I went to bed at a decent hour, I would have enough energy to get me through the next day. And of course the never ending mom-guilt of not being enough for my kids. I know tasks didn’t get done, but I was there for my kids. My little ones still need me and I will try to have enough love and energy to give to all of them!
It feels like every time I’m in public with my littles, someone will inevitabley approach me. They will say something complimentary about my kids and then before walking away they will say something like: Soak this all in, they will grow up and be gone before you know it. My sleep-deprived self is a tiny bit annoyed over this statement, however I know deep-down-this person (who has most likely experienced it all) is right. I know I will miss these precious times with my kids one day. So I take a breath and try again to have patience with my children. I try to soak all the good, bad and sleep-deprivingness (yep made up that word) in.
If there is anything I want you to walk away knowing from this article it is this: YOU ARE ENOUGH! You are doing enough, and in the eyes of your children, you are everything and more to them! Take a deep breath, ignore what others are saying and doing- you mama- YOU are enough and you are doing a great job!
Xoxo,
Jordyn